as much as the concept of Jesus being a fairly normal lad has its charms, im personally very intrigued by the idea of him being just… extremely weird. not even in a mystical sense, just…….staggeringly BIZZARRE.
you go to the well to get some water, and here’s Miriam’s boy, staring at the sky, completely still. his expression is unreadable. you hazard a hello and ask how he’s doing, and he slowly, unblinkingly, lowers his gaze on you (he’s 8 and is missing his frontal teeth, not that this is making you any less uncomfortable) and says “I cannot speak of the state of my being, Nathan son of Saul, my brother, but rejoice for the water you shall take today will be as pure as the soul of the children of Heaven”
…you start sweating
normal person in 1st century Nazareth: making my way downtown, walking fast
*sees J boy, 8 yo, staring at you from across the street*
normal person: walking faster
even funnier, the only person 100% on board with his Prophetic Kid Talk is his mother Miriam, an otherwise placid, absolutely normal woman around 25 or so
kid JC, coming home at twilight, a single white dove following him and chirping with weirdly human-like precision:
moth̫́er,̦͌ ̮̉i h͙̉av͔̽e ͓͗b̘̃r̞̓o̮͘u̲̒gh̟͒t̺́ you a do̗͐ṽ͙e̢͘ ͈̾m͒͢a͈̽dē̝ ỏ̘f ͈̓c̆͜l͔̂aỷ͇ aṋ̑d̳̿ g͢͞i̹̾fted̖͡ ̻͐it ͓͂w̖̿it̎͜h t̥̃h͙͒e ̨̒m̧̂i̡̍ŗ͒â̫cḷ̔è̤ ̛̻of̞̅ l̘̈i̛̦fè̳
Miriam: ! that’s my little boy :) now let’s go get ready for dinner :)
her husband Yosef, a carpenter who only marginally got signed up for this:
This post is so Christian, but it’s the spicy kind of Christian that gets you murdered by other Christians for heresy, so I’m torn.
literally biggest form of compliment i’ve ever gotten
You guys really need to read Christopher Moore’s Lamb, if you haven’t.
Always reblog Cryptid Jesus
I love that you guys used their actual names
I did not consider Eldritch Baby Jesus.
i mean this in the gentlest way possible: you need to eat vegetables. you need to become comfortable with doing so. i do not care if you are a picky eater because of autism (hi, i used to be this person!), you need to find at least some vegetables you can eat. find a different way to prepare them. chances are you would like a vegetable you hate if you prepared it in a stew or roasted it with seasoning or included it as an ingredient in a recipe. just. please start eating better. potatoes and corn are not sufficient vegetables for a healthy diet.
If you're nervous about having to buy whole vegetables you might not end up liking, I would highly recommend going somewhere like a hotpot or buffet style restaurant with others. With hotpot you pay for your base broth and then any of the vegetables or meats you order are free, and while you can share with your friends, you can also likely just ask for much smaller amounts of different veggies, and say you're trying them out. You can then stir them into your broth and they taste so much better than you'd think. Every time I come back from hotpot I always have a few new veggies I start adding to my ramen.
Ubisoft confirms that they will delete your account and purchased games if you are inactive for too long
How the hell is this legal ????
WHat the fuck!?
is this what the kids are listening to these days?
Took me a while to identify what in the world the other brass was till I realized it wasn’t.
jesus god someone transcribed this i can’t believe it
(for those of u who are new to my house: my cousin is the one playing the chair)
I love this so much
🚨⚠️ATTENTION FELLOW WRITERS⚠️🚨
If you use Google Docs for your writing, I highly encourage you to download your work, delete it from Google Docs, and transfer it to a different program/site, unless you want AI to start leeching off your hard work!!!
I personally have switched to Libre Office, but there are many different options. I recommend checking out r/degoogle for options.
Please reblog to spread the word!!
Crypt Pad can be an option too!
I don’t use Docs very much at all, but this looks like a good moment to take a sweep through my account and delete anything that’s in there.
